In This Moment
When I didn't have a handle on my depression I dreaded the Fall. Oh, how I fucking dreaded the Fall.
Now that I have found a way, at least for the moment, to keep it in a box, locked, deep in the files of my brain...I want the rain. I want the bleakness of a sunless day. I can go to that box. Unlock it. Open it. And make it dance for me. Its footprints leave a dark trail for me to read and shape. Then, I can snatch that evil bastard up and squeeze it between my fingers until it oozes out the last of its debilitating intent onto a page, a song, or both. Then, back into the box.
In this moment I have no fear of that shadow breathing its cold breath of emptiness on my neck.
In this moment.
Now that I have found a way, at least for the moment, to keep it in a box, locked, deep in the files of my brain...I want the rain. I want the bleakness of a sunless day. I can go to that box. Unlock it. Open it. And make it dance for me. Its footprints leave a dark trail for me to read and shape. Then, I can snatch that evil bastard up and squeeze it between my fingers until it oozes out the last of its debilitating intent onto a page, a song, or both. Then, back into the box.
In this moment I have no fear of that shadow breathing its cold breath of emptiness on my neck.
In this moment.
